Lost Gallery: What is going on here? Review for September 2011

The real question is: How did they get in there?

Furman Boles took this picture with his big toe.

Grady's nose healed quickly.

Gilbert realized finally that he needed another mode of transportation. What if it rained?

The gang tried in vain to make it to the water without burning their feet.

Some distance up the beach, the vacationing entertainment and publicity director for Rockefeller Center suddenly got the idea for a dancing chorus line. Would it work?

Actually Route and Sorbell weren’t real twins at all. Route was left on our street by gypsies and Mom said she didn’t know where Sorbell came from. But they always dressed alike and neither one of them could pronounce “billfold” correctly.

The girls were happily singing their chanting song over and over. Michael, thoroughly sick of it, rowed the boat ashore and stomped off to the nearest pub where he ordered a pint, a half dozen pickled eggs and three prunes. Or maybe it was three pints, half dozen…oh never mind.

The “Mickey-Girls” club had been celebrating their 45th consecutive dateless weekend. The meeting was held in a hired row boat from the Hammer, Tackle and Boat Rental of Piedmont Beach, Montana.

Startled and puzzled by Michael’s abrupt behavior, the girls voted they would never hire him to row their boat again.

Velda suggested they all go into the pub and get out of the sun. Charlotte and Heidi objected to that because there appeared to be some crawling things in the sand around the boat. Myra said Cleo ate one of them. Cleo denied it but you know she would.

Juno was just glad they didn’t have to swim ashore. Her secret would be safe for another chapter meeting at least.

Look, up in the sky! It's a bird ... It's a plane!

It's a goat?

Looking for a phone booth.

Superman’s other disguise.

He enjoyed this one more than his Clark Kent outfit.

He found he still needed the glasses though.

It was Melanie’s headband, and she was keeping it. It was given to her on that romantic ride with “Standback” and his motorcycle gang out along the city drainage canal.

Melanie’s mother had advised her from childhood to save herself and not fall for the first man that came along; to look around; to play the field; to look deep. Now, at 42 she was very glad she honored her mother’s advice. “Standback” was the perfect match for her. She had thought Eldon Shrough was the perfect match too but he disappeared after only 8 years. And there was Tudie Fence before that and…well that’s another story.

Sebert “Standback” Spang, gang leader, was a janitor at a dry cleaning plant by day and by night a watchman for a pet groomer. He barely had time between jobs to change uniforms. There was no rest for the wicked he knew, and boy was he wicked. He had to learn to sleep standing up and he really disliked his uniforms because they covered his BPP* tats.

But on Sundays, (and alternate Tuesdays) he and his gang, Pete and Jergen Pheltz, went out along the drainage canal to stir up whatever mischief they could muster. Of course there was never anyone else there and so rolling small stones into the canal was always the worst they could come up with. Once Jergen fell in the canal but was able to get back on the bank without help. No one would have helped him anyway because of the smell.

At the end of each frenetic “rave” out on the canal banks the gang vowed to get real motorcycles so they could discontinue renting golf carts every Sunday (and alternate Tuesdays).

Melanie met “Standback” at the pet shop one morning just as the night job shift ended. Melanie rattled the door and woke him. That following Sunday (and alternate Tuesday) they rode together along the canal and “Standback” gave her the head band. Of course, it was really a just dog collar unintentionally left at the pet shop by a forgetful St. Bernard. The engraved name “Wrecks” was cleverly hidden with a strip of duct tape. Melanie didn’t care. She was not ever going to take it off. It was hers and she was keeping it. Besides, her hair was caught in the buckle.

*Ball Point Pen

The most popular photographs
An album of the most requested photographs in the Lost Gallery.

Area 51 and a Half
You are probably not authorized to see these.

Don't take my picture! Oh! You DID didn't you! This is a collection of photographs that disappear on the way home from the photo processing shop.

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THE KIDS
It is always a mystery how a photograph of any of these precious children could end up lost or abandoned.
Here are a few.
You will probably say "Ooh..." at least once.